Recent reports indicate that Meghan Markle, the Duchess of Sussex, has been restricted from borrowing jewelry from Queen Elizabeth‘s esteemed collection, igniting discontent among royal insiders and family members.

Allegations have surfaced suggesting that the restriction stems from the Queen’s dissatisfaction with Meghan’s behavior during her time as a royal.

Last month, claims emerged asserting that the Queen had “banned” Meghan from accessing her personal collection of jewels, which notably includes pieces worn by both the Queen herself and the late Princess Diana.

It was suggested that Kate Middleton had access to these exquisite pieces, while Meghan did not.

However, reinforcing Meghan’s side of the narrative, sources at Buckingham Palace have dismissed these allegations as “not true” and noted that they have left Prince Harry and the royal family feeling quite displeased.

The Queen’s collection, featuring tiaras and other invaluable heirlooms, is occasionally lent out for formal occasions, purely at the monarch’s discretion.

An insider elaborated to Elle about the situation, making it clear that the Queen did, in fact, lend Meghan a tiara for her wedding day and offered her earrings for her first official engagement.

The source added, “Recently, there haven’t been many occasions that call for royal jewels since Meghan joined the family.”

Further, a comment from the palace clarified the ongoing limitations, stating that it was not any outright “ban” on Meghan’s jewelry usage but rather a reflection of the nature of royal events.

“Usually, these items are reserved for significant functions, and there simply haven’t been many of those since her marriage to Harry,” the insider explained.

The palace noted that with Meghan’s recent absence from high-profile state functions, the need for such precious adornments diminished.

Additionally, it was made known by a royal source that while access was limited for Meghan at this juncture, future opportunities for borrowing items could arise as circumstances evolve.

Previously, the Queen had lent Meghan the exquisite Queen Mary’s tiara, specifically created in 1932, and it was on this very piece that Meghan secured her royal identity during the wedding ceremony.

However, the Duchess encountered hurdles when it came to acquiring a different tiara for her first overseas state dinner.

Prince Charles had advised her against it, indicating that a more understated approach was preferred in light of the event’s context.

During that state visit to Fiji, Meghan’s decision to forgo a tiara drew attention, especially as Kate Middleton wore a significant headpiece all the while.

Dressed in a blue gown, Meghan instead opted for dazzling diamond earrings, presumably on loan from the royal collection.

Tensions appeared to be simmering not just for Meghan but also between the royal brothers, with reports highlighting that Prince William had been informed about the policies restricting Meghan’s access.

While the Queen holds a special place for Meghan, the essence of maintaining hierarchy within the royal family weighs heavily in her decisions.

It’s been noted that the Queen’s accessibility to certain jewels for Meghan was affected by Meghan’s perceived demands as a newcomer.

A source indicated that some behaviors leading up to Meghan and Harry’s wedding had left Buckingham Palace feeling uneasy about opening the royal vault fully to her.

Moreover, reports assert that the Queen did indeed enjoy a personal connection with Meghan but simultaneously felt the need to maintain royal order.

As the next in line and a prominent member, Kate naturally has greater access to royal accoutrements.

Speculation also circulates that certain high-value items, such as the Bahrain Pearl Drop earrings, are currently among those not available to Meghan.

So while suggestions of a complete ban have been called into question, the reality remains that not all the jewels in the royal repertoire are open to the Duchess at this time.

Despite these restrictions, Meghan has had the opportunity to wear some pieces associated with Princess Diana’s personal collection.

For instance, Meghan has donned butterfly earrings and an aquamarine ring, remnants of Diana’s legacy passed down to her sons’ future wives.

The dynamic between Meghan and Harry and the rest of the royal family continues to evolve amid these ongoing disputes over jewelry use.

Recent months have seen the couple relocate to Windsor, drawing further distance from Prince William, as they establishing separate households amidst the growing rift.

How Meghan lost the Queen’s trust

Initial Welcome and Special Treatment

The relationship between Queen Elizabeth II and Meghan Markle began with extraordinary promise and unprecedented gestures of royal inclusion.

In a striking break from tradition, the Queen extended an invitation to Meghan to spend Christmas at Sandringham in 2017, well before her marriage to Prince Harry – a privilege not previously afforded to other royal brides-to-be like Kate Middleton or Sophie Rhys-Jones.

Royal commentator Richard Eden noted the significance of this gesture, explaining that “Courtiers say the Queen believed that Meghan – a divorced, mixed-race American actress – would be a breath of fresh air and a great asset to the Monarchy.”

This early invitation was widely interpreted as a clear signal of the Queen’s approval and her desire to welcome Meghan into the royal fold.

Meghan herself recalled this first Christmas warmly in the Netflix documentary series, sharing, “I remember so vividly the first Christmas at Sandringham, calling my mom, and she’s like, ‘How’s it going?’ and I said, ‘Oh, my gosh, it’s amazing.’ It’s just like a big family like I always wanted. And there was just this constant movement and energy and fun.”

The Queen’s support extended beyond social occasions.

She took the unprecedented step of expediting Meghan’s integration into royal duties by having her attend a Commonwealth Day service – her first official engagement alongside the Queen – mere months before her wedding to Harry.

This was seen as a clear indication of the Queen’s eagerness to include Meghan in official royal business and help establish her as a working member of the family.

During these early days, the Queen’s actions suggested a genuine desire to smooth Meghan’s path into royal life.

She made several highly personal gestures and, according to royal insiders, saw great potential in what Meghan could bring to the monarchy.

The Queen’s Christmas broadcast that year even included subtle references to new additions to the family, believed to be nods to both Meghan and the anticipated arrival of Prince Louis.

This initial period was marked by optimism and what appeared to be genuine warmth between the Queen and her future granddaughter-in-law.

Meghan would later reflect on this time with appreciation, telling Variety after the Queen’s passing, “What’s so beautiful is to look at the legacy that his grandmother was able to leave on so many fronts.

“Certainly, in terms of female leadership, she is the most shining example of what that looks like. I feel deep gratitude to have been able to spend time with her and get to know her.”

Pre-Wedding Tensions

The Tiara Incident

One of the most publicized pre-wedding controversies centered around the selection of Meghan’s wedding tiara, an incident that has multiple versions and continues to be debated.

According to royal biographer Robert Lacey, tensions arose when Queen Elizabeth reportedly refused the tiara Meghan wanted just days before the ceremony.

The incident allegedly took place during what Prince Harry later described as an “extraordinary morning” in the Queen’s private dressing room, where Meghan was offered access to Her Majesty’s collection of tiaras.

Present at this fitting were the Queen herself, her trusted dresser Angela Kelly, and a royal jewelry expert.

While the initial selection process appeared to go smoothly, problems allegedly arose when Meghan tried to arrange subsequent fittings with Kelly.

According to royal sources, the situation escalated dramatically.

Lacey wrote that “Not for the first time, nor sadly the last, the word ‘no’ pushed a button inside him, and he flew into a rage.”

The historian noted that the presence of numerous dressers and royal personnel during this time meant the argument quickly became public knowledge.

The most controversial aspect of the incident was Prince Harry’s alleged declaration, “What Meghan wants, Meghan gets!” – a statement that reportedly did not sit well with the Queen.

Her Majesty was said to have responded firmly, “Meghan cannot have whatever she wants. She gets the tiara that I give her.”

This exchange, if accurate, marked one of the first visible signs of tension between the new couple and the established royal hierarchy.

However, Prince Harry has since disputed this version of events.

In his memoir “Spare,” he explicitly denied ever making the “What Meghan wants” statement, though he did acknowledge feeling exasperated with Kelly, writing that she gave him a look that made him shiver.

Catering Controversies

Another pre-wedding tension point emerged during the wedding preparation’s food tasting sessions.

According to royal expert Katie Nicholl’s book “The New Royals,” a significant clash occurred when Meghan questioned the palace caterers about the ingredients in their dishes.

The incident reportedly unfolded when Meghan, who had requested vegan options for the wedding menu, discovered eggs in one of the dishes.

According to Nicholl’s account, the Queen intervened during this interaction with a sharp reminder about royal protocol, allegedly stating, “Meghan, in this family, we don’t speak to people like that.”

This incident, while disputed by some sources, highlighted what would become a recurring theme: the clash between Meghan’s direct, American-style approach to handling situations and the more traditional, hierarchical structure of royal operations.

It also provided an early glimpse of the Queen’s willingness to step in when she felt royal standards of behavior were not being met.

These pre-wedding tensions, while perhaps seeming minor in isolation, would later be seen as early indicators of the challenges that lay ahead.

They represented fundamental differences in approaches to royal life and tradition, differences that would eventually contribute to much larger conflicts within the family.

Early Marriage Period

The period immediately following Harry and Meghan’s wedding was marked by various efforts from the Queen and the royal institution to help Meghan acclimate to royal life, though these attempts met with mixed success and some controversy.

One of the most notable integration efforts came directly from Queen Elizabeth herself, who suggested that Meghan seek guidance from Sophie, then-Countess of Wessex (now Duchess of Edinburgh).

This recommendation was particularly significant as Sophie was widely considered one of the most successful examples of an “outsider” adapting to royal life.

According to Robert Jobson’s book “Our King Charles III: The Man and the Monarch Revealed,” the Queen made this suggestion warmly, believing that Sophie’s experience would be invaluable to Meghan’s transition.

However, this well-intentioned suggestion met with an unexpected response.

As Jobson writes, “When the Queen, who had asked her then assistant private secretary Samantha Cohen to work alongside Meghan for a bedding-in period, warmly suggested that she should turn to Sophie, Countess of Wessex for support and advice, Meghan dismissed the idea, saying: ‘I’ve got Harry.’” The Queen was reportedly “surprised” by this response.

This account was further corroborated by royal broadcaster Gyles Brandreth, who told ITV’s Lorraine: “The Queen said to Meghan: ‘You’re new to this.

Coming into the royal family, it’s not easy for everybody. Sophie Wessex, the last one to come in, maybe she can be a kind of mentor.

She could advise you, help you.’ But Meghan said: ‘No, I don’t think I need that, I’ve got Harry.’” The Queen’s efforts extended beyond suggesting mentorship.

She took the extraordinary step of assigning her trusted assistant private secretary, Samantha Cohen, to work directly with Meghan during what was intended to be a “bedding-in period.”

This was a significant gesture, as Cohen was one of the Queen’s most experienced and trusted staff members.

Sophie herself later reflected on these early days during an interview with The Sunday Times, diplomatically noting, “We all try to help any new members of the family.”

She added hopefully, “I just hope they will be happy.” This comment came after the Sussexes had already departed from their royal roles, lending it additional poignancy.

The period was also marked by what some observers saw as cultural misunderstandings.

During the Sussexes’ Netflix docuseries, Meghan revealed that she had thought it was a “joke” when Harry asked if she knew how to curtsy shortly before her first meeting with the Queen.

This admission would later be seen by some as indicative of the cultural gulf between Meghan’s American background and the centuries-old traditions of the British monarchy.

These integration attempts, while well-intentioned, ultimately highlighted the growing disconnect between the traditional royal approach to adaptation and the Sussexes’ desire to forge their own path.

The Queen’s efforts to provide support through established channels met with resistance, setting the stage for future tensions within the family.

Growing Strains

The Lilibet Name Controversy

One of the most significant controversies that emerged in the later period of the Queen’s relationship with the Sussexes centered around the naming of their daughter, Lilibet Diana Mountbatten-Windsor, in June 2021.

This incident became a focal point of tension that revealed deeper fissures within the royal family.

According to royal biographer Robert Hardman’s book “The Making of a King: King Charles III and the Modern Monarchy,” the Queen was “as angry as I’d ever seen her” when she learned about Harry and Meghan’s public claims regarding their daughter’s name.

The use of “Lilibet” – the Queen’s deeply personal childhood nickname – became a point of serious contention. The Queen’s reported reaction was particularly poignant.

As Hardman recounts through a staff member close to the monarch, she expressed her frustration in stark terms: “I don’t own the palaces, I don’t own the paintings, the only thing I own is my name. And now they’ve taken that.”

This statement revealed a deeply personal hurt that went beyond mere protocol concerns. The controversy centered around two competing narratives.

The Sussexes maintained that they had sought and received the Queen’s blessing to use the name.

Their legal representatives issued a strong statement asserting that “Had she not been supportive, we would not have used the name.”

They emphasized that Harry had spoken directly with his grandmother about the name before making any public announcement.

However, palace insiders presented a different version of events.

According to Hardman, the monarch’s staff viewed the Sussexes’ narrative as a “lie” and felt that their attempt to portray the naming as having received explicit approval was misleading.

Some sources suggested that rather than asking for permission, Harry had merely informed the Queen of their decision – a crucial distinction in royal protocol.

The dispute over the name “Lilibet” continued to fuel debate within royal circles.

While some viewed it as a loving tribute to the Queen, others saw it as an inappropriate appropriation of an intensely private family nickname.

Even the confirmation from the Sussexes’ spokesperson that the Queen had been the first family member Harry contacted after the birth did little to resolve the underlying tension.

Hardman writes that this incident was “one of the final straws for Her Majesty,” suggesting that it marked a significant turning point in the already strained relationship.

The controversy highlighted not only the growing distance between the Sussexes and the rest of the royal family but also the increasing difficulty in managing competing narratives about private family matters that had become very public.

This incident was particularly significant as it touched on something deeply personal to the Queen – her childhood nickname – and came at a time when the relationship between the Sussexes and the royal family was already under considerable strain following their departure from royal duties and their explosive interview with Oprah Winfrey.

The Exit Crisis

Queen’s Response to “Megxit”

The departure of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle from their roles as senior royals – dubbed “Megxit” by the media – marked one of the most challenging periods in modern royal history.

According to multiple sources, the Queen’s handling of this crisis revealed both her public diplomacy and private emotional response to this unprecedented situation.

Prince Harry later revealed in his interview with Good Morning America’s Michael Strahan that the decision “was never a surprise to anybody, least of all her.”

He elaborated, saying, “She knew what was going on. She knew how hard it was.”

Importantly, Harry noted, “She never said to me that she was angry. However, I think she was sad that it had got to that point.”

However, royal author Katie Nicholl’s book “The New Royals: Queen Elizabeth’s Legacy and the Future of the Crown” presents a more complex picture of the Queen’s private reactions.

According to Lady Elizabeth Anson, a confidante of the Queen, “I don’t think the Queen ever truly understood Harry’s decision to leave.”

The book reveals that the Queen wrote directly to Harry and Meghan about their departure, making it clear that if they chose to leave, they couldn’t continue to reap the benefits of being royal.

In private moments, the strain on the Queen became apparent.

According to Anson, the monarch confided, “I don’t know, I don’t care, and I don’t want to think about it anymore,” revealing her exhaustion with the situation.

The Queen was particularly saddened by the impact on her relationship with her great-grandchildren, as she “got to see so little of Archie and Lilibet.”

The Queen’s public response, however, remained measured and diplomatic.

All her official statements consistently emphasized that Harry and Meghan remained “loved” members of the family, even as she dealt with the practical implications of their departure.

This approach reflected her decades of experience in handling family crises with dignity and restraint.

Yet, by August 2022, just a month before her passing, sources reported a marked shift in the Queen’s private views.

During a drinks reception at Balmoral, according to The Spectator, the Queen made what was described as an “out of character” remark, allegedly referring to the situation with Meghan as a “complete catastrophe.”

The source noted, “It was a startling sentence to hear from the most forgiving woman on earth.”

Despite these private struggles, the Queen maintained formal channels of communication with the Sussexes.

In April 2022, Harry and Meghan made their first joint visit to the UK since their departure, stopping to see the Queen on their way to the Netherlands for the Invictus Games.

This visit demonstrated the Queen’s willingness to maintain family ties even amid institutional separation.

The exit crisis revealed the complex balancing act the Queen had to perform: maintaining the dignity of the monarchy while dealing with a deeply personal family matter, supporting her grandson while protecting the institution she had served for decades, and navigating the public and private dimensions of an unprecedented situation in modern royal history.